Easter and the meaning of the Cross

New thoughts on old theories

My last post was all about traditions and how we tend to hold on to them, even if they don’t work for us anymore. Continuing with that theme, I’m tackling a very difficult subject here - one of Christianity’s most precious holidays - Easter. I hesitated to dive into this because I’m clearly no theologian, nor expert on religion. However, I know many of you, like me, are trying to reconcile past teachings along with newfound insights and discernment in your spiritual lives, so I’m going to explain my recent journey with Easter, and the meaning of the Cross. I hope that might help some of you - or at least give you some things to ponder upon this weekend.

I remember it well. It was Easter 2020. That was when everything changed for me.

Many of us were home, quarantined because of the pandemic. People were scared because of the rapid spread of the COVID-19 virus, the sudden economic disruption, and a global recession. The U.S. experienced record unemployment rates, businesses shut down, and schools closed. I had never seen anything like it in my lifetime. Everyone seemed ready to give up what they needed to in order to help the world stop the spread of this horrible disease.

Well, almost everyone. Except conservative Christians.

I watched as much of the American Christians refused to wear masks, choosing to believe in conspiracy theories instead of legitimate news reports, and choosing “their freedoms” over the good of their communities. They were enraged that the government was asking them not to go to church on Easter, claiming religious persecution. And many churches flat refused to close their doors, again choosing their religion over the wellness of the members. (side note: I know of two people that contacted the virus from going to church and later passed away).

I had already been pretty deep in the deconstruction of my beliefs, but this whole thing put me over the edge. WTH? The slogan “faith over fear!” was the new Christian mantra against taking precautions against the deadly virus (ironically as they refused to give up their guns, but I digress). And this was even before the vaccines divided us.

I remember calling my pastor at the time and telling him, “I’m not sure Christianity is my path to God anymore.” That is how disturbed I was by everything going on at the time.

After much prayer and Bible study, I decided that I wasn’t going to leave the religion that I had turned to all my life and which had helped me in so many ways, but I also needed a fresh perspective on it all. So I continued with my deconstruction and Easter has been one thing I have gone back to time and time again, trying to make it make sense.

The old atonement theories weren’t working for me anymore. The God I knew wasn’t a bloodthirsty God. The God I knew wasn’t cruel, inhumane, unfair, wrathful and vengeful. Those attributes belonged to humans, not God. So how do I make sense of the whole Easter thing? Here is where I have landed, as of today: